Imposter syndrome isn’t just a nuisance.
It’s an obstacle that can really affect the trajectory of your career— for the worse. If this term is new to you, let me fill you in. Imposter syndrome is the unwarranted feeling that you’re undeserving of whatever role you’re in, or success you’re experiencing. That thought pattern can hold you back from making advancements that you’ve earned, but that you don’t think you deserve.
You may feel like “What I’m experiencing isn’t imposter syndrome… it’s not a syndrome, I really am an imposter.” But I guarantee you that’s not true, and what’s actually happening is that these thoughts are gripping you extra tight.
Don’t believe me? I’ll prove it.
The amazing Barbara Corcoran, who is undoubtedly a badass boss, said: “Even when I sold my business for $66 Million, I felt like an absolute fraud!”
And when Natalie Portman delivered the commencement address at Harvard, years after she herself was a student there, she said: “I have to admit that I’m still insecure about my own worthiness… when I came to Harvard Yard as a freshman in 1999 … I felt like there had been some mistake — that I wasn’t smart enough to be in this company and that every time I opened my mouth I would have to prove I wasn’t just a dumb actress.
These two incredible women are undeniably mega-successful. I’m sure if you were in the room when they talked about their insecurities, you would say: “Natalie, girl, that’s just the enemy between your ears talking! This is textbook imposter syndrome.” Well, if you can see Natalie Portman’s merit without clouded judgment, why can’t you see yours?
And the list of successful people who have grappled with imposter syndrome is endless: Tom Hanks, Penelope Cruz, Howard Schultz (the former CEO of Starbucks), Tina Fey, Amy Schumer have all talked openly about struggling with Imposter syndrome. And would you say that Tom Hanks is a fraud? Heck no. So treat yourself with the same kindness that you would Tom Hanks.
Here’s What I Do.
If I listened every time I told myself that I was an imposter, I wouldn’t be here writing this for you now. So along the way, I had to come up with some ways to combat those moments of insecurity. Here are three things that have worked for me:
- Become a mentor. Whether this means taking a junior colleague under your wing, or speaking to a group of young professionals in your industry, I’ve found that nothing stops imposter syndrome in its tracks faster than sharing your experience with a mentee. Being able to impart what you’ve learned to someone who is green in their career, can help you realize how much you do know, and how much you have grown since you yourself were green in your career.
- Keep a success folder. I’ve mentioned this before on the show, but you should get in the habit of documenting your wins. (Yes, I do know how dorky I sound, but you should seriously try this!) Whenever I get a nice email from a business partner, I print that out and put it in my success folder. The wonderful reviews on my podcast Money Rehab? You better believe I screenshot those and keep them in my success folder. When I was broke and in debt, my success folder was my financial self care. When I looked at my incoming bills: I felt like a failure. But in those moments, I could turn to my success folder, and know that I was doing all the right things to get me to where I wanted to go.
- Talk to your tribe. Sometimes we can get so deep into our thoughts that we lose perspective. That’s when you need people that you love and trust to reorient you. The only way to let go of these feelings is to let them go. if you keep everything bottled up, it will haunt you… trust me. I’ve found that the small act of saying hard things out loud makes me feel immediately better. But you don’t have to take my word for it: give it a try.
xo,
